ACTIVITY CALORIES BURNED
------------------------------
REMOVING CLOTHES:
With partner's consent.......................................................12
Without partner's consent...............................................187

UNHOOKING BRA:
Using two calm hands............................................................7
Using one trembling hand..................................................36

Lifting partner.......................................................................15
Dragging partner on floor...................................................16
Using skateboard.....................................................................3

ACHIEVING ERECTIONS:
For normal healthy man.......................................................2
Losing erection.....................................................................14
Searching for it...................................................................115

PUTTING ON CONDOM:
With erection..........................................................................1
Without erection................................................................300

INSERTING DIAPHRAGM:
If the woman who does it is Experienced..........................6
Inexperienced........................................................................73
If a man does it....................................................................680
Add (5) calories for retrieving it from across the room.

ACCORDING TO NATIONALITY:
Italian- Man on top,woman in kitchen...........................26
Russian- Woman on bottom, Man getting permission..55
American- Both on top......................................................60

SIDE EFFECTS INTERCOURSE:
Bouncing..................................................................................7
Sliding around.........................................................................9
Serious skidding....................................................................12
Whiplash................................................................................27

ORGASM:
Real..........................................................................................27
Faked.....................................................................................160

ORGASMIC INTENSITY SCALE:
Shoes flew off........................................................................35
Expression didn't change......................................................1
Orchestra swelled...................................................................6
Birds sang
Large birds...............................................................................7
Small birds...............................................................................3
Earth moved..........................................................................30

PULLING OUT:
After orgasm...........................................................................1
A few moments before orgasm.......................................500

PENIS ENVY:
For woman...............................................................................3
For men..................................................................................72

GUILT:
Despite no formal training, orgasm comes easily..........53
You're enjoying sex,despite the fact that other people are starving..2
Sex on your lunch hour..........................................................3
Putting it on expense account............................................20

AGGRAVATION:
Partner keeps showing plants...............................................5
Partner insists on cuddling the dog during foreplay......14
Partner visiting bathroom for 7th time...........................10
Partner taking phone calls....................................................7
Partner making phone calls................................................40

GETTING CAUGHT:
By partner's spouse..............................................................60
By your spouse....................................................................100
Trying to explain..................................................................55
Trying to remain calm......................................................100
Leaping out of bed................................................................75
Getting dressed in one motion........................................500
Thanking partner quickly.....................................................2